Sunday, May 15, 2011


This past week has been very dreary weather wise. On one rainy dreary morning drive to school, my ipod shuffled to Dashboard.

Oh Dashboard, you reflected the inner workings of my emo soul during those teenager years. And, you, always and forever, remind me of a bond formed between my brother and I. I vividly remember belting this song as I drove me and my brother home one late night.

"The Brilliant Dance"

So this is odd,
the painful realization that all has gone wrong.
And nobody cares at all,
and nobody cares at all.

So you buried all your lover's clothes
and burned the letters lover wrote,
but it doesn't make it any better.
Does it make it any better?
And the plaster dented from your fist
in the hall where you had your first kiss
reminds you that the memories will fade.

So this is strange,
our sidestepping has come to be a brilliant dance
where nobody leads at all,
where nobody leads at all.

And the picture frames are facing down
and the ringing from this empty sound
is deafening and keeping you from sleep.
And breathing is a foreign task
and thinking's just too much to ask
and you're measuring your minutes by a clock that's blinking eights.

This is incredible.
Starving, insatiable,
yes, this is love for the first time.
Well you'd like to think that you were invincible.
Yeah, well weren't we all once before we felt loss for the first time?
Well this is the last time.

The last part was our we were both (at the same time, even though we are years apart) "in love" with our first little boy/girl friends of our lives. His was Hillary, mine was Colin. Our first kiss happened I think...a day apart? haha. I was just so happy that his first kiss wasn't before mine. And he absolutely loved that his first kiss happened so shortly after mine. And I remember taking his little girlfriend home from...a movie? youthgroup? ...who knows, and us talking and singing of love and crush's on our long drive home. We sure bonded during that time of our life. I love that memory. I'm glad I had that first boyfriend,pretty much just cause I got to share "the first" of it all with my little brother. =)

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