If you’re like me, you love a good birth story, heck even a boring birth story. There’s a million and one
ways it can all unfold and it is just pure magic whatever way it does. If you’re also like me, you
probably weren’t really into birth stories until you were pregnant/had children and that’s okay too. Or
maybe this isn’t your thing in general. Wherever you’re at with that, you’re also at my blog. =) The day
my two children were born feel like the longest day and shortest day- a million intense and magical
and serious and crazy moments packed into a short and long amount of time. Mark and I are still
remembering little moments that we never had a chance to process during all that was, and for me it’s
all the littlest moments that I want to remember. So, a detailed birth story:
ways it can all unfold and it is just pure magic whatever way it does. If you’re also like me, you
probably weren’t really into birth stories until you were pregnant/had children and that’s okay too. Or
maybe this isn’t your thing in general. Wherever you’re at with that, you’re also at my blog. =) The day
my two children were born feel like the longest day and shortest day- a million intense and magical
and serious and crazy moments packed into a short and long amount of time. Mark and I are still
remembering little moments that we never had a chance to process during all that was, and for me it’s
all the littlest moments that I want to remember. So, a detailed birth story:
We started our day much like we start every day. At 6:30 Mark was up and getting ready for work,
and I was still laying in bed (trying to) sleep. Jubes woke up and climbed into bed with me for some
morning snuggles. Mark was in the shower when I had some sudden, intense pain. I called out to him
that I was hurting and wasn’t sure what was up. After a minute or two that pain subsided and then
normal contractions started.. By 10am I was having regular contractions. When I was pregnant with
Jubes I planned to stay home as long as I thought possible, but we knew with this baby things would
play out differently for several reasons: my first birth was fairly fast, our hospital can take anywhere
from 20 minutes to 1.5 hours to get to depending on traffic, and our childcare plan was all up in the
air depending on time of day we needed to depart. But, there’s just something so nice about being
in labor at home, am I right? Jubes settled in for some morning cartoons and way too many snacks,
almost oblivious to me. She did ask at one point if I was frustrated, to which I responded, no, but
when babies come it’s hard work for mamas. ;) I scurried around the house finishing laundry and
dishes and other tasks that I didn’t want to come home to with a new baby. Mark was teaching but
had a planning period around 10:30. When he got home and discovered via our family line group that
my contractions were timing between 4 and 6 minutes apart, he went into high alert mode and started
moving us towards the door. I kind of have a love/hate relationship with anxious Mark that shows up
during births and newborn baby life. But- after finalizing a few things, showering, calling our wonderful
friends to settle Jubi’s care, and a slow waddle out to the taxi stand- we were on our way. At that
point my contractions had slowed down and were closer to 10 minutes apart, which I attribute to my
husband’s anxiousness. =)
and I was still laying in bed (trying to) sleep. Jubes woke up and climbed into bed with me for some
morning snuggles. Mark was in the shower when I had some sudden, intense pain. I called out to him
that I was hurting and wasn’t sure what was up. After a minute or two that pain subsided and then
normal contractions started.. By 10am I was having regular contractions. When I was pregnant with
Jubes I planned to stay home as long as I thought possible, but we knew with this baby things would
play out differently for several reasons: my first birth was fairly fast, our hospital can take anywhere
from 20 minutes to 1.5 hours to get to depending on traffic, and our childcare plan was all up in the
air depending on time of day we needed to depart. But, there’s just something so nice about being
in labor at home, am I right? Jubes settled in for some morning cartoons and way too many snacks,
almost oblivious to me. She did ask at one point if I was frustrated, to which I responded, no, but
when babies come it’s hard work for mamas. ;) I scurried around the house finishing laundry and
dishes and other tasks that I didn’t want to come home to with a new baby. Mark was teaching but
had a planning period around 10:30. When he got home and discovered via our family line group that
my contractions were timing between 4 and 6 minutes apart, he went into high alert mode and started
moving us towards the door. I kind of have a love/hate relationship with anxious Mark that shows up
during births and newborn baby life. But- after finalizing a few things, showering, calling our wonderful
friends to settle Jubi’s care, and a slow waddle out to the taxi stand- we were on our way. At that
point my contractions had slowed down and were closer to 10 minutes apart, which I attribute to my
husband’s anxiousness. =)
We got to the hospital around 12:30 but decided to hang out awhile before checking in. Our care
package is timed, so we wanted to be smart about that. But also, I didn’t want to be discouraged
by any bad news that I wasn’t dilated or baby wouldn’t come for awhile (as I had falsely been with
Jubilee). We got some yummy snacks and settled into some comfy chairs in a lobby and had some
really lovely conversation for a few hours. Every time contractions rolled around I would slowly lift
myself from my seat and walk back and forth through the pain. I got lots of smiles from passersby,
some occasional looks from an old man sitting across the room, and finally decided I was done with
the lobby when a women came and sat right next to me and openly stared at me during my
contractions. So, off to the maternity ward we went.
package is timed, so we wanted to be smart about that. But also, I didn’t want to be discouraged
by any bad news that I wasn’t dilated or baby wouldn’t come for awhile (as I had falsely been with
Jubilee). We got some yummy snacks and settled into some comfy chairs in a lobby and had some
really lovely conversation for a few hours. Every time contractions rolled around I would slowly lift
myself from my seat and walk back and forth through the pain. I got lots of smiles from passersby,
some occasional looks from an old man sitting across the room, and finally decided I was done with
the lobby when a women came and sat right next to me and openly stared at me during my
contractions. So, off to the maternity ward we went.
We checked in around 2:30. My doctor was in and asked to check for dilation after chatting with me.
She was shocked that I was dilated to a 5, baby had turned a bit and was in a better position
(he’d been posterior the last half of my pregnancy or so), and she was sure I would have the baby
before the day was over.
She was shocked that I was dilated to a 5, baby had turned a bit and was in a better position
(he’d been posterior the last half of my pregnancy or so), and she was sure I would have the baby
before the day was over.
By 3:30 we were in the labor and delivery room. We pretty much chose this hospital and remained
with the same doctor we used for Jubes because the natural birthing room at Samitivej is awesome
and decked out with lots of tools to help you progress through your labor and manage the pain. I don’t
know if everyone has this experience with the staff there, but we love that they kind of let us run the
show. Once we figured out how to dim the lights and plug in our playlist and fill the tub- they made
themselves scarce unless we asked for them to come. One of my goals during this labor was to try to
remain active and upright for as long as possible. It was so interesting to experiment with my
movement and positioning- I could tell my labor slowed down when I laid or sat- if you are an
expecting mom and got it in you- stand! I took a short dip in the tub (because my labor is always in
my back and that warm water is the bessst) but got out as soon as I started to get a bit drowsy, as
with Jubilee I felt the tub completely zapped me of my energy. After spending more time pacing and
bracing against the ladder I was ready to rest my feet- which I had pretty much been on since 7 am. I
spent some time resting and listening to music in bed. During my labor with Jubilee I had not wanted
Mark to touch me or massage me or honestly even talk to me- I went inward to deal with the pain and
any distraction was unwanted. But this time (at the unsolicited encouragement from my doctor) Mark
helped with counterpressure on my back.
with the same doctor we used for Jubes because the natural birthing room at Samitivej is awesome
and decked out with lots of tools to help you progress through your labor and manage the pain. I don’t
know if everyone has this experience with the staff there, but we love that they kind of let us run the
show. Once we figured out how to dim the lights and plug in our playlist and fill the tub- they made
themselves scarce unless we asked for them to come. One of my goals during this labor was to try to
remain active and upright for as long as possible. It was so interesting to experiment with my
movement and positioning- I could tell my labor slowed down when I laid or sat- if you are an
expecting mom and got it in you- stand! I took a short dip in the tub (because my labor is always in
my back and that warm water is the bessst) but got out as soon as I started to get a bit drowsy, as
with Jubilee I felt the tub completely zapped me of my energy. After spending more time pacing and
bracing against the ladder I was ready to rest my feet- which I had pretty much been on since 7 am. I
spent some time resting and listening to music in bed. During my labor with Jubilee I had not wanted
Mark to touch me or massage me or honestly even talk to me- I went inward to deal with the pain and
any distraction was unwanted. But this time (at the unsolicited encouragement from my doctor) Mark
helped with counterpressure on my back.
Me during labor is something like this:
Early labor: Hey babe, can you get me some water from over there. Oh, this song, love that it’s on this playlist.
Remember that time…Do you mind rubbing my back?
Remember that time…Do you mind rubbing my back?
Mid labor: Mark- water- now. Back rub.
Transition: WATER. BACK.
Height of labor: Angry grunts that Mark must decipher or more angry and exasperated grunts will follow.
I have no idea if I spent ten minutes or two hours laying there, but during that time I was already
feeling done and done. I remembered my labor with Jubes and that my progression from 8 to 10
had felt incredibly long and hard so I waited as long as I could before asking to be checked to push.
I was very sad to hear I was only 7 cm dilated. Around this time I decided that something didn’t feel
quite right- my contractions seemed less strong and I could tell my doctor was concerned about them
and my level of fatigue. When the staff left again I told Mark I was worried that if something didn’t
happen differently soon, we would be headed towards some sort of interventions.. And as much as I
wanted to be done, like immediately (I had actually already told Mark I was ready for someone to
just “cut this baby out”), I’m also really afraid of all medical things (like IVs and shots and major
surgeries like a cesarean). So, I hoisted my humongous self up and found my best spot (clutching
the ladder and squatting into each contraction) and within ten minutes I was ready to push. In fact,
I felt so sure baby was so close I moved to the pushing chair and instructed Mark to get ready to
catch the baby. Haha! I wasn’t quite there yet but when the doctor arrived she gave me the greenlight
and I pushed from the chair several times (and again, as before, I couldn’t have done it without
Mark’s coaching- not sure why breathing and pushing and counting aren’t all possible for me at the
same time, but they absolutely aren’t). I then moved back to the bed as my doctor felt she could
better guide the baby out and ensure a smaller wound for me from that position.
feeling done and done. I remembered my labor with Jubes and that my progression from 8 to 10
had felt incredibly long and hard so I waited as long as I could before asking to be checked to push.
I was very sad to hear I was only 7 cm dilated. Around this time I decided that something didn’t feel
quite right- my contractions seemed less strong and I could tell my doctor was concerned about them
and my level of fatigue. When the staff left again I told Mark I was worried that if something didn’t
happen differently soon, we would be headed towards some sort of interventions.. And as much as I
wanted to be done, like immediately (I had actually already told Mark I was ready for someone to
just “cut this baby out”), I’m also really afraid of all medical things (like IVs and shots and major
surgeries like a cesarean). So, I hoisted my humongous self up and found my best spot (clutching
the ladder and squatting into each contraction) and within ten minutes I was ready to push. In fact,
I felt so sure baby was so close I moved to the pushing chair and instructed Mark to get ready to
catch the baby. Haha! I wasn’t quite there yet but when the doctor arrived she gave me the greenlight
and I pushed from the chair several times (and again, as before, I couldn’t have done it without
Mark’s coaching- not sure why breathing and pushing and counting aren’t all possible for me at the
same time, but they absolutely aren’t). I then moved back to the bed as my doctor felt she could
better guide the baby out and ensure a smaller wound for me from that position.
My Jubilee girl came out in just a few pushes and they put her right on my tummy. I’d remembered reading about the “breast crawl” and I watched in awe as Jubes did just that. It was beautiful and miraculous and perfect in every way and I love to think of those first few moments and they always bring me the happiest of tears.
Paxton came more slowly, and when they finally put him on my chest it was with a quick “he isn’t
breathing” and “the cord was around his neck” before they quickly rushed him out of the delivery
room, with Mark following behind. Thinking about this moment makes me cry different kinds of tears.
breathing” and “the cord was around his neck” before they quickly rushed him out of the delivery
room, with Mark following behind. Thinking about this moment makes me cry different kinds of tears.
To say I wasn’t my best self in those moments is, well, to say the least. There may have been a time
that I would have felt a bit more untouchable from the tragedies of the world, but it has passed. And I
remember praying or saying or thinking that this will not be our story. I asked my doctor what would
happen and I honestly don’t even remember if she responded to me or not (though surely she must
have). But not long after we heard his cries. We named our son Paxton Ayaanle, and one day soon
we’ll share more about why. But we thought it fitting that he lived up to his name so very quickly, as
Ayaanle means lucky one.
that I would have felt a bit more untouchable from the tragedies of the world, but it has passed. And I
remember praying or saying or thinking that this will not be our story. I asked my doctor what would
happen and I honestly don’t even remember if she responded to me or not (though surely she must
have). But not long after we heard his cries. We named our son Paxton Ayaanle, and one day soon
we’ll share more about why. But we thought it fitting that he lived up to his name so very quickly, as
Ayaanle means lucky one.
Our hours following Paxton’s birth were difficult. I had a harder delivery and lost a lot of blood. I was
dizzy and faint, could barely even sit up by myself. Paxton’s oxygen levels kept dipping so after his
initial breaths and checks they brought him back so I could see him, but when his levels dipped again
they rushed him to the NICU. He was born at 7:50 pm and I didn’t get to hold him until 11:00 that night.
I know that compared to many mom’s stories, that’s nothing, but it was a lonely 3 hours for me.
dizzy and faint, could barely even sit up by myself. Paxton’s oxygen levels kept dipping so after his
initial breaths and checks they brought him back so I could see him, but when his levels dipped again
they rushed him to the NICU. He was born at 7:50 pm and I didn’t get to hold him until 11:00 that night.
I know that compared to many mom’s stories, that’s nothing, but it was a lonely 3 hours for me.
We remain incredibly thankful for the care we received at our hospital, despite some of the cultural
differences and occasional communication struggles that made some moments frustrating. I’m feeling
so much better- so much better these last two weeks, and overall sooo much better than the last
several months of my pregnancy. And praise God, Paxton Ayaanle is just fine and will suffer no long
term health consequences despite his rocky beginning.
differences and occasional communication struggles that made some moments frustrating. I’m feeling
so much better- so much better these last two weeks, and overall sooo much better than the last
several months of my pregnancy. And praise God, Paxton Ayaanle is just fine and will suffer no long
term health consequences despite his rocky beginning.
We prayed that Paxton would be bigger than his sister was (but not too big!) and a good eater (one
day maybe I’ll write about what getting Jubilee to eat was like..) and he is both!
day maybe I’ll write about what getting Jubilee to eat was like..) and he is both!
Little man was born on December 10th at 7:50 pm weighing 7.5 pounds and 19.5 inches long.
I have been delighted to find that he is so different than Jubilee was- his sounds and movements and
needs. We can’t wait to learn him better. I’ve also been delighted to find that I am not nearly as
anxious as I was with my first…which is probably normal but super helpful. Jubilee has handled things
incredibly well. The hardest part is figuring out how to juggle them both, love them both well, and still
remain a bit sane and get a few winks of sleep. ;)
needs. We can’t wait to learn him better. I’ve also been delighted to find that I am not nearly as
anxious as I was with my first…which is probably normal but super helpful. Jubilee has handled things
incredibly well. The hardest part is figuring out how to juggle them both, love them both well, and still
remain a bit sane and get a few winks of sleep. ;)
